Happy Thanksgiving to everyone reading this. I would normally plan out a big ordeal for social media and my blog, but this year has been even more unexpected than anyone could have expected. So rather than give you a “5 things I’m thankful for” or “3 ways to be thankful during a pandemic” post I wanted to give you a stream of my conscious. I think it’s important to share to you how I found gratitude this year, in hopes that it can give you a thread of peace.
All Images were taken by Symone at Multifaced Creative
At the beginning of the year I started a spiritual journey, along with Richard. (I talk about this a bit in my New Year Blog). We started working on ourselves first, and attacking the issues in our marriage head on. (Every marriage has issues so don’t think that implies anything). I’ve talked about this in blogs before, but I felt completely lost and I think this year I was able to find little threads of myself. Now I feel like an actual person. I’m still trying to find my purpose, but I feel like I’m on the right path.
The pandemic put a hold on a lot of that process, but I was able to go to therapy at the beginning of the year. One of the moments that stuck with me was when my therapist told me “happiness is gratitude.” Keeping a gratitude journal is so important to well-being. She hit the nail on the head of me.
I began focusing my energy on things that served me and gave me joy. Remembering things that gave me purpose when I was younger, like reading books and writing music. Without a greater plan, I started doing those things, that gave me joy. Which was important. I wasn’t focusing my energy on fixing someone else or giving others happiness, I did want I wanted. I think I have a long way to go. I’m still searching for some of the pieces to my puzzle. There’s just a clearer picture of the image I’m trying to create.
We’ve accomplished so much this year, outside of the chaos. Connecting with my family was so important, which came without intention. We always subconsciously know we’re stuck with our family, but we were quick literally stuck with our family this year. I’ve found joy in watching Leo grow everyday and spending time with my dad. To see my sister and her boyfriend, whom I consider family at this point, really grow together is inspiring. I’ve also learned that I can’t fight Richard’s battles for him. What I need to do is be fully supportive and understanding without loosing myself in the process.
Now’s your turn to go do something for yourself, just to make you happy. Something that doesn’t serve anyone else, or cost you money. Something that truly feeds your soul.
November 25, 2020
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